Brain Run Run

Maybe it’s the caffeine, maybe it’s the emotional junk I ran into inadvertently this morning, but my mind keeps running on about interpersonal things instead of thinking about the Wooden Pillow Exercises book I’m supposed to be editing right now. I should just do Brain Education training and let it all go, but I decided to wait until the next top of the hour and just write for the moment instead.

I don’t really have a point. I know what I’m thinking about is pointless. I just need to move on, but when I try to move on, I encounter my own hurt and anger inside. Maybe I should just deal with that instead. What is it that I’m holding? This would be more productive than focusing on other people; it may even help me focus on my work.

I know what I want to do with the book. I had a member when I worked at the Body & Brain Center in Newton, Massachusetts, which has since closed. He was a young guy, muscular—a former high school wrestler. He LOVED the wooden pillow. He would lie on the ground in the training room and stick it under all different parts of his body, grunting and groaning. He thought it was the best thing ever and wanted to invent hundreds of exercises with it and write a book. I privately dedicate this book to him.

It also makes me sad to think about him, because he was killed a few years later. I think he was 24 when he died. I know he wouldn’t want me to be sad, and that he’s moved on, but I think I like my sadness about it, because it seems romantic and proper. But once I experience it, the emotion passes through me quickly.

Maybe that’s what I should do today. Instead of being afraid of all of these negative emotions, I can just be with them and let them pass through me until I get to the zero point again. As the new thought leaders say, what you resist, persists.

This goes along with the chapter on attachment I’m going through now in I’ve Decided to Live 120 Years Personal Workbook—Chapter 7. The chapter is about inner peace, but emphasizes that in order to have peace, you have to let go of your attachments.

So good-bye emotions . . . until next time. It’s all good 🙂

Throw No Shade

Yesterday, when I saw pictures of people having fun far away from me, I realized that the criticism and judgment I feel, which I’ve now localized to a part of my colon near my left hip, and perhaps my tailbone as well, stems from seeing people that I like, but not feeling as cool as them and not knowing how to speak and interact with them as well as they do among themselves.

As I recognized this, I felt I could let that judgment go more easily. Awareness is so critical to growth.

Here’s to not getting stuck in the “evil meanies.”

Love and light for everyone!

I Love This

I’ve had so much to say, or at least thoughts in my mind, over the last few days. Things that have sounded good; my ego gave them props. However, I didn’t take the time to write them down. I just fed them more movies, books, and music—my steady diet of media that is as habitual as eating bread and coffee for breakfast (or even more so).

As I sit here writing, I found that I enjoy it, however. The act feels soothing, and I feel a world of possibilities opening in my soul. What is this feeling? Can I keep it? Perhaps, if I balance it with other things. I wouldn’t want to get too crazy. Just follow the middle path, they say.

Is my way of doing things and thinking OK? That is the constant question. The question really asks: Am I valuable? At the same time, a drive toward something better and different, more refined, is there, calling me forward. These do not need to be exclusive. In fact, they are complementary.

Lately, I’ve been listening to a Korean (Korean-American) rapper called pH-1. He is groovy and positive. The best part is, he has the word LOVE tattooed over his throat. PERFECT!!! I have half a mind to copy him, but in reality, I don’t like copying people.

ph-1_love-tattoo

pH-1’s Tattoo, a Korean Rapper [Source: @ph1boyyy Twitter]

Here’s a couple of interviews he did that I watched. I really admire his mission of sharing positive messages, because that is my mission as well.